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Looking for girlfriend > Looking for a friend > My boyfriend doesnt have a job and i pay for everything

My boyfriend doesnt have a job and i pay for everything

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FAQ on Coronavirus and Mefi : check before posting, cite sources; how to block content by tags. Dedicated boyfriend but unemployed and unambitious, should i end it? I'm 29, have a doctorate, make 6 figures and own my own place. I've been with a guy who is 5 years younger than me for 6 months now. When we first met he was very honest and revealed that he never finished high school but has a GED, he tried 1 semester of college but dropped out; he also disclosed without me asking that his job paid 30k a year. I have to admit it was very refreshing to come by such confidence and honesty.

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: When a Man Ignores Your Value, Say THIS To Him

My Boyfriend Can’t Find a Job and It’s Driving Me Nuts!

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My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. We have been living together for 4 months. He rented a room in a house previously and I rented a small house with my two children.

Now we are renting a small house together. With his child support, truck payment, etc…. That is just rent, food, utilities. I work two jobs and he works one. He says he wants to help but is unable. He is trying to find some extra jobs, on the side, but not very hard.

He is the nicest, most wonderful man I know. He treats me nice, he never expects anything from me. I am starting to resent him though. He says he will pay a third. He tells me everyday how much he loves me, he brings me flowers when he can. He never yells at me or criticizes me.

Should I just keep paying and just let him pay what he can? He never goes out or spends foolishly on himself.

This is not about who earns more. So let me begin, Lisa, by expressing my admiration and sympathy to you. But then, in a gender-blind society, who said things had to be fair?

I made about four times what my wife made when we met. Would it have been fair for me to ask her to split our rent in half? No, it would not. We split it based on our means to pay. I could have resented the fact that I made four times more than her, but I chose not to.

I was with her because of how I felt in her presence. She stays at home with the kids, goes to Mommy and Me classes, swimming classes, MyGym and Disneyland, all of which I pay for. Do I resent her? Not one bit. This is the bargain we struck as a couple. Dump him! First, you need to have an authentic conversation with him. You need to start by acknowledging how much you love and appreciate him. Next, you can break it down for him. You contribute five times more to the household than he does, even though you only make X dollars more.

Get his acknowledgement of this fact. This would include how much money you make from child support and would exclude how much he pays in child support. You can go to Mint. But the one thing that is going to have to change is how much he contributes to the household in non-monetary ways. Not everyone can have a high paying job. The reason this feeling is building up inside is that you feel taken for granted.

His reaction to this conversation will tell you whether you have a relationship worth preserving. The woman works two jobs, takes care of two kids, and this nice guy expects his girlfriend to do all the cooking and housework too?

All he needs to do is to show up with flowers once in a while. Sweet deal for him. I was in the same situation …. I finely dump him. You have rock on you back that will sink you. Run …. He flat out refused to get another job. I left him and now have a wonderful man that totally supports me and cooks and cleans.

I enjoy doing for him because that makes him a great guy. This guy sounds like a joker. Nicest guy? Lazy is anything but nice. Then I still find time for the kids and to take the lady on dates.

However, if you asked my wife, she would reply that she accomplishes all of this somehow from her seated position on the couch while watching real housewives a majority of the day. I own 2 dogs. Curious — what do you even like about your wife?

It sounds like you do so much and not only does she not see it, but somehow thinks she does the same thing. She is better off by herself! He is a mooch! Definitely not a good role model to have around her kids. He said he injured his back on his job, and his job paid him disability benefits for about 3 years and when that ran out he started getting SSI because he was not eligible for SSDI.

It do not seem like he is disabled at home he runs up and down steps, Walk down the steps without holding on to anything and walk long distances. That do not sound like he have a disability, to me it sound like he is milking the system.

I been on my job for 11 years and I get up everyday and go to work while he enjoys a stress free life. I have a lot on my plate. Also our 11 year old son need braces now. I only bring home per month from my job per month. This is beginning to be too much for me to see him sitting on his butt. He also proposed to me 10 years ago without a ring. This is too much for me. Although that sounds kind of cold, I think that math would be more fair to him.

Your math is incorrect. How much does she pay him for that? They rented the small house and picked it out together! Please read it thoroughly. He is a joke! As we mothers tend to coddle our sons. They have been together 2 years, then decided to move in together. How can you even fathom what you wrote? There are two problems here. One is contributing to taking care of the house and kids in terms of time and energy.

This is a question of generousity, and of hours… picking up the kids from school, taking them to activities, etc. If there is nothing there, there is nothing there, and that is a big problem.

The second problem is financial. He has dollars to contribute to running a household. One that is more expensive because of her kids. He is already going to have to do something to not start in the hole from day one. Aside from emasculating the boyfriend and venting, I am not sure what outcomes you expect from demanding equal payments.

He is there to get almost everything for free. Would be nicer if he cook or clean. He needs a Mother not a wife or a woman in his life. But anyway goodluck! And why would he get his own room when they are a couple? Your comment is ignorant in every way possible.

You must be one of those freeloaders dan! He knew who he was moving in with, his significant other!

Love Or Money? 5 Things To Ponder Before You Dump Your Broke Man

Tired of paying for everything? Learn how to save your money and your relationship. Of course, his lack of income might not be the only reason for the sudden breakdown in her commitment level, but clearly money was causing tension in their relationship and they were on the fast track to a terrible breakup. I bumped up against my own money panic button years ago, at the start of a relationship. But throughout the weekend, as money flowed out to pay for everything, I found myself keeping a running tally of who had paid for what.

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. We have been living together for 4 months.

I believe in splitting costs during the early stages of a relationship and not combining bank accounts until you get married. I love my partner and the relationship we have, and having a guy who paid for everything would make me super uncomfortable as well. The problem is that from a financial standpoint, his industry choice sucks. Freelance work is not a guarantee, and he can go for weeks or even months without a solid paycheck. The inconsistency is the toughest because even when he has some in the bank and wants to treat me, we both know he might need that money for the next lull in work.

Christina, 29, has been with her serious boyfriend for several years. Whenever they go anywhere, she now pays for them both. This could go one of two ways: It could be the catalyst for your breakup, or it could be the first major challenge that you and your boyfriend get through together. Neither will be fun or sexy. Of course, you need to be very strategic about this. In , my then-boyfriend quit a job he hated without another one lined up, and it took a lot more time than either of us expected for him to find something new. But as months passed, he got discouraged, and I did too. Then I felt guilty. After one particularly stressful workday, I freaked out and cried and told my boyfriend I was worried that we might never have enough money to send our children to college and retire the way I wanted — and we were both 25 and nowhere close to having kids.

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SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: Hey Steve: Waiting for His Financial Stability -- STEVE HARVEY

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Sep 11, - If you're in a loving relationship but your partner struggles with This means I have to pay for everything, including food, his cosmetics, rent and electricity. It doesn't help that he is uneducated so he probably won't be able to find a This is especially so now that job creation and the economic situation of.

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Comments: 3
  1. Mushakar

    Remarkably! Thanks!

  2. Bazil

    And it can be paraphrased?

  3. Kigale

    It is simply remarkable answer

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